A shocking truth: there is no greater critique for women than women. As much as it reality that men may still have double standards on various issues when it comes to women, femininity, gender etc. You won’t find a greater adjudicator than women over woman. We judge each other constantly:
-if you are too sexual you are a whore;
– if you are too career minded you are not maternal;
-if you dress a certain way you lack self respect;
-if you are “too” friendly with males you seek attention,
– if you are too successful you are neglecting friends/family;
-if you don’t want kids then God forbid you call yourself a woman…endlessly..
No other group imposes confusion on a females identity and her true sense of self than the opinions and ridicule of other women. With women being more socially knit in an interdependent way (generally), more so than men, this creates a conflict of belonging vs fitting in. On one end support from the very group that accepts you when you fit in with the norm of whats expected but are quick to ridicule & alienate you as soon as you are “different”. Yet many of these women have the desire for individuality & personal expression that they crave less the judgement they impose on others! Publicly women we condemn each other for choosing to be ourselves yet privately wish for emancipation.
These labels and rigid expectations despite years of feminism continue to be dominant moulds that want to limit phenomenal women into a box of what’s “acceptable” to other women [more so than men]. If you look at it, these same standards applied for women by women are not applied to men as well. Men: they can be as sexual as their libidos allow (boys will be boys) and career focused as they wish (man must provide) but what of the equality we preach of? Shouldn’t the woman freely do all she feels she is capable, or are we as women waiting for permission to say it’s ok to support one another…that until then, we are ridiculing one another waiting for approval to say ‘women unite’.
From the way I see it. As much as gender is an issue among men and women. Women vs women is a big part of the problem that needs to be addressed as well… (Thoughts && a little rant on the Go..)